My kids make the Stormiest day Sunny!

 I wake up this morning and have a little face just inches from my nose!  Good morning Mommy I hear! After a night of not sleeping well because of the strained muscles and bruises covering my arm he is a refreshing start to any day! I have struggled with my self esteem for my entire life and sometimes I settle for what I have because I let that person convince me that I can't do better!  I let him convince me that I created this misery myself! My councilor explained to me yesterday that because I grew up with  abuse then I have grown to be accepting of it. She said it's a form of normal for me.  And she is right.  I How do I change it?  How do I re-train my head to know that it's wrong?  That's what I am working on now.  Well that and going to school full-time and being a full-time mom and working a part time job and keeping my fingers crossed that I get another part time job that I have already interviewed for twice already!  I think that if I could find some friends here I would be a happier person!  So I have decided that I'm going to search them out at school!  I'm not a drinker and don't do the bar scene.  My outing's consist of going to the Dirt bike track with my 6 year old and supporting him as he races around the track! So if anyone is new to the area like me or you just want a new friend then holler!LOL  Don't mean to sound desperate but I am!  I am NOT looking for people to feel sorry for me because I have put myself in this position and I am the only one who can change it!  I guess I have said so many prayers, that I'm just waiting for the change!  I have faith in God that he will not give me more then I can handle.